CBS Logo

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Top Ten Good Things About Turning 58
  
Guests are no longer offended when I fall asleep.
People telling me I look like an "older Alan Greenspan".
I am now an honorary junior "60 Minutes" correspondent.
Memory loss makes dated comedy material seem new and fresh.
The staff got me a subscription to large-print "Penthouse".
Memory loss makes dated comedy material seem new and fresh.
Great excuse to do 58 shots of Jager, dude!
This morning, I got a kiss from the toll booth guy.
I'm halfway to 116.
Instead of "Go screw yourself," staffers now say "Go screw yourself, grandpa!"
·

Sorry, no Top Ten Extras!

"Late Show" Rewind: Week of November 24 - 28, 2008
Highlights of Nicole, Bruce, Reese, Dave's mom -- plus, a sneezing monkey!
 Watch now
A Tony Mendez Thanksgiving
Join Tony for a holiday filled with turkey, gravy, more gravy and more!
 Watch now
Top Ten Signs You're Watching a Bad Thanksgiving Day Parade
 Watch now
November 28, 2008
 Watch now
Print Send to a friend

Advertisement